Yesterday's study focused on loneliness. I shared a brief 15-20 minute lesson then we had a guest speaker, Keva Farney of Stafford, Kansas. Below is my lesson followed by info on Keva and the link to her blog, Hope In Jesus.
If you were to define loneliness what words would you use? That was the question posed to the ladies at Thursday study. Words like, sad, isolated, not fitting in, fear,depression, abandoned, rejected are just a few of the words mentioned.
Knowing that God has created us with a wide range of emotions one may wonder why God would create us with an emotion described by such negative terms. The past couple weeks as we have studied the emotions of anger and jealousy (visit previous postings, Temper, Temper and The Green Eyed Monster) we found that both of these emotions, while negative in nature, do have some positive relevance to them as indicated in the scriptures. But what about loneliness? Could God have intended this sad, dark emotion to have a good side as well?
During my 51 years on the earth I have had my own bouts with loneliness. When I think back on those times I find the words, empty, void, missing something, coming to mind. As a fifteen year old I remember retreating on many an occasion to my bedroom to draw, paint, write poetry (I was a bit of a loner as well as a nerd, the artsy, craftsy type.) Being a loner I was not surrounded by very many friends. (Thank you, Vicki and Jenny for being my two closest buddies, for loving me in spite of my nerdiness.)
Since I was a loner at heart I enjoyed retreating to my bedroom to practice my creativity. However, some of those times of retreat were met with moments of deep loneliness. It was in those moments God made Himself known to me. I would find myself in a weepy state asking God to wrap His arms around me because I felt lonely and sad. And He did. No, I did not feel physical arms wrapped around me but what I did feel was a quickened sense of peace as the sadness left me. I physically felt enveloped by His presence. To this day I am amazed that the God of the universe would actually take the time to respond to a lonely fifteen year old girl's cry for a hug.
Fast forward about 20 years and I find myself surrounded by a loving husband, three young children and many wonderful friends. Once again, loneliness would visit me. This time though it was not just occasional moments of loneliness like I experienced as a teenager but now there were occasional seasons of loneliness. God in His goodness once again would show up to comfort me but unlike the sudden peace I experienced years earlier God took me through these difficult seasons, teaching me about His love and grace. He was by my side all along.
Perhaps you too have gone through moments or seasons of loneliness. I believe most, if not all, women have or will, at some point in their lifetime, suffer with similar bouts. The reason? We have, as human beings, a tendency to have expectations that others will fill, what I refer to as, our God pocket. The 17th century French mathematician Blaise Pascal puts it so much more eloquently when he says,
"There is a God-shaped vacuum in the heart of every man which cannot be filled by any created thing, but only by God, the Creator, made known through Jesus Christ."
God in His wisdom placed within our spiritual hearts a hole which was intended only to be filled by Him. And when we seek to fill that hole with other relationships we can find ourselves with a sense of loneliness when those people don't "deliver" as we expected. Perhaps this is why you find God saying on many occasions throughout His word to "Seek Him" like in 1 Chronicles 16:11 -
Seek the Lord and His strength, seek His face continually."
and in James 3:8a -
"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you."
In our books on page 35 #5 the phrase "to know and be known" is used, indicating relationship. God desires relationship with the ones created in His image. That's you and me sweet sister.
Psalm 62:8 indicates a very personal message stating:
Trust in Him always, O people;
Pour out your heart to Him;
God is a refuge to us.
Augustine, as quoted in A.W. Tozer's Pursuit of God, prays,
"Thou has formed us for Thyself and our hearts are restless till they find rest in Thee."
Being an absolutely true and profound statement I thought it would be more relevant to us in our study on loneliness this week to tweak it just a bit and translate it into our modern English:
What if we prayed:
"You have formed us for Yourself and our hearts are lonely until we find companionship, friendship, relationship in You."
God's desire is for us to have a personal relationship with Him. Through the life and death of His Son, Jesus Christ He has provided a way. By God's grace and by our faith in that grace we can step over the threshold into the Holy and Holies and have a personal relationship with the King of the universe. Yet we can find ourselves, even those of us who have taken that step of faith, seeing God as a distant God and not the intimate, close and personal God that He is.
God is not at all distant as Tozer states from the the pages of The Pursuit of God,
"Wherever we are, God is here. there is no place, there can be no place where He is not. Ten million intelligences (persons) standing at as many points in space and separated by incomprehensible distances can each one say with equal truth, God is here. No point is nearer to God than any other point. It is exactly as near to God from any place as it is from any other place. No one is in mere distance any further from or any nearer to God than any other person."
In essence, Tozer is stating that you, sweet sister, reading this blog from another house, state or even country is no nearer or no further to God than I am or anyone else is. God is omnipresent, meaning He is always present everywhere. So you can easily say, "God is here" wherever you may find yourself today, tomorrow or next week as can I and anyone else on the face of this earth.
This truth is so well confirmed by David in Psalm 139:1-18. Although a bit long it is worth reading every word, soaking up all its amazing truth:
"Lord, you have examined me
and know all about me.
You know when I sit down and when I get up.
You know my thoughts before I think them.
You know where I go and where I lie down.
You know everything I do.
Lord, even before I say a word,
you already know it.
You are all around me—in front and in back—
and have put your hand on me.
Your knowledge is amazing to me;
it is more than I can understand.
Where can I go to get away from your Spirit?
Where can I run from you?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there.
If I lie down in the grave, you are there.
If I rise with the sun in the east
and settle in the west beyond the sea,
even there you would guide me.
With your right hand you would hold me.
I could say, “The darkness will hide me.
Let the light around me turn into night.”
But even the darkness is not dark to you.
The night is as light as the day;
darkness and light are the same to you.
You made my whole being;
you formed me in my mother’s body.
I praise you because you made me in an amazing and wonderful way.
What you have done is wonderful.
I know this very well.
You saw my bones being formed
as I took shape in my mother’s body.
When I was put together there,
you saw my body as it was formed.
All the days planned for me
were written in your book
before I was one day old.
God, your thoughts are precious to me.
They are so many!
If I could count them,
they would be more than all the grains of sand.
When I wake up
I am still with you." NCV
Wow! That is incredibly powerful truth for our lonely hearts. I encourage you to read this psalm through several times over and be reminded you are not alone. Speak these words often "God is here". Then do as Psalm 62:8 suggests, trust in Him and pour out your heart to Him for He is a refuge, especially for the lonely heart.
Keva Farney shared with us at study Thursday the many journal entries she has written in the past 3 1/2 years starting with the day her husband, Tyler was first diagnosed with non-smoker's lung cancer on March 8, 2007. He went on to be with Jesus in heaven on October 17, 2009. I encourage you to visit Keva's blog Hope in Jesus where you can read many of those journal entries. You will be blessed as you read Keva's transparent heart at the difficulties of adjusting to life without her husband and by her daily, sometimes moment by moment "choice" to go to God for her every need.
To visit Keva's blog go to http://lbrhopeinjesus.blogspot.com/ or click on the link at the right hand side of this page.
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